Imagine if you walked into your first day at a new job and told to “Do a good job”, but nothing further.  Imagine you were given: no clear boundaries or expectations about what criteria defines doing a “good job” only corrective feedback when you didn’t do a “good job”. ie “That was not okay! Don’t do that!” How would you feel each day at work? I imagine you would be quite frustrated.  Some people would shut down and not try anything, while others might scream and throw a fit.  Others might just try all day to see what you could get away with before getting in “trouble”.  This is how our children feel when we don’t define boundaries for them. 

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